Memory and Presence

How can we improve memory retention during meetings? Presence, empathy, and thinking from the heart are the key.

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Memory and Presence

I was recently asked how one can improve their memory. The context was meetings—both one-on-one and in teams or groups. I did some research and found many methods for taking notes. I usually write by hand, but I also use my laptop to take notes during meetings—sometimes almost verbatim. I use the notebook where I write by hand primarily for reflection, contemplation, follow-up thoughts, and next steps. During very personal conversations, I also use the notebook because I don’t want a “machine” between “us.”

Every now and then—with the others’ permission—I record an audio of the conversation and have a transcript created from it. The AI then generates a summary for me. There are now many apps that do this for you. With multiple meetings a day, I think this is very helpful because you can’t remember everything. On the one hand, I find an AI summary somewhat fascinating (the AI does a great job), but on the other hand, it feels superficial. It’s quick; I file it away and hardly ever read it again. But it can be very useful as a memory aid.

I think memory and presence are connected. The more present, aware, and engaged I am in the meeting, the better I remember it—including the details. In any case, there should be enough time to immediately jot down the most important points after a meeting. Because when other topics and meetings come up throughout the day, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep the topics separate.

So how can you strengthen your memory?

I’d like to mention three aspects:

Empathy, interest, warmth

I listen as attentively as possible with empathy, genuine interest, and human warmth. I am very alert and fully present. I take everything in—the other person, their gestures, voice, skin tone, the content, the room, the colors, etc.

Clarity of thought, with my heart in it

I listen to the other person’s information and feelings and process them with my clear, luminous thinking. My thinking is highly active and—to put it figuratively—it virtually grasps the content and perceptions. In doing so, I am fully present with my whole heart. Thinking becomes heart-thinking.

Holding the space, intention, and next steps

I listen to what the person actually wants. Sometimes I might ask: What do you actually want? I am so fully present that I decide in the moment whether the next steps are already due, or whether it is too early and I would first like to continue just listening, hold the space, and hold and support the person internally.

These three aspects, or activities, are done simultaneously. The more conscious and alert you are to the situation, the better it goes.

It helps to enter a state of coherence before the conversation. You can do this by 1) bringing your awareness to your heart area, 2) breathing a little more slowly there, at a comfortable pace, and 3) evoking a pleasant, appreciative feeling. You can immediately detect and verify your coherence, for example, using the Inner Balance Sensor from HeartMath via biofeedback (I am not getting any money by recommending this).

Or you can simply collect yourself before a conversation and resolve to be fully awake, completely calm, and open on the inside.

Warm regards,

Alexander Schwedeler